Category: Elder Folk
I'm sitting here contemplating this last week. My sister was in the hospital for several health issues. As the youngest of seven children, and the loss of my eldest sister several years ago, I realize how priceless my siblings really are. Facing their mortality makes me face mine. The oldest was 19 years older than me, the next seventeen, another fifteen, another thirteen, another ten, and another four. What makes me cringe is the time that seems to pass so quickly, or should I say, Their time. Some have heart problems, one has Lupus, one is a Diabetic. one is going deaf, the one who was in the hospital this last week has major things wrong with her, and I'm thinking, "Where did the time with them go?" Being the youngest and dealing with their health and ages just makes them more precious. Yes, I could die tonight, die next week, die this very moment. But I'm the healthiest one in my family. I never thought I would be dealing with aging siblings. I took it for granted they would always be young. Strange isn't it? The things we take for granted.
I know how you feel. Although I am second from the oldest of my sibs, one of them has already died. In '03, my baby sister died of congestive heart failure and that death, coupled with the deaths of my brother-in-law and my aunt, put me into a depression that I am only now starting to recover from. The mortality issue, both mine and theirs, is definitely there as well as a feeling that my life is leaving me. I have even thought that one of the things that probably kills off people as they get older is the fact that the landscape of their lives changes so much that you can no longer recognize where you are anymore. One day maybe you just get lost in the unfamiliar landscape and slip out the door, or you just get too lonely and give up.
Reader, you are so right. It's so strange, one minute you're a child, the next, you're an adult, and your kids are playing with their kids, then everyone in that generation grows up, leaves home, and you see their parents, and here you are, seeing these older people you lived with, and you think, this can't be happening. It's been ten years since my older sister's death, and I think how fragile life is, and how short it is. My sister, who was in the hospital, is now on oxygen, has high blood pressure, fibromyalgia, and countless other things wrong with her. We just never thought we'd get to this point.